winfield park

its late in the evening and i am thinking about my grandfather...he died last december and i always felt horrible that i never gave him a proper eulogy...nor did anyone...you see we were all too devastated...he was not a vain man, but would have appreciated a few words...so i will give you a few thoughts on him now...

my grandfather, only raised his voice to me once...i was young, and undoubtedly doing something completely annoying...i do not remember what it was but i most certainly enjoyed it...i was used to getting yelled at for the most minute of actions, but being yelled at by him was something foreign to me...his subtlety is what assumed respect...and this was the beauty of my grandfather...he didnt demand respect but he always received it...i remember after he got alzheimers, he did not recognise me as his grandson...but he did recognise me...he used to say 'i know you, i like you, you are always helping me out'...alzheimers will take away your ability to recognise loved ones, but not your ability to recognise love...goodness is impossible to transcend...whatever illness is thrust upon you, peace is understood...i miss him...even in the throes of his disease he could pick up a guitar and play a song from years passed...remember the haunting chords of the country...nothing important is ever forgotten...he always reminds me of the lines, "then maybe when we meet someday i will know you"...he knew it and we do too, he's awake and we're still dreaming...